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楼主
发表于 2008-8-13 17:05 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |正序浏览 |阅读模式
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Englishman

  Once, late at night, an Englishman came out of his room into the corridor of a hotel and asked the servant to bring him a glass of water. The servant did as he was asked. The Englishman re-entered his room, but a few minutes later he came into the corridor again and once more asked the servant for a glass of water. The servant brought him another glass of water. Every few minutes the Englishmen would come out of his room and repeat his request. After a half-hour the astonished servant decided to ask the Englishman what he was doing with the water. "Nothing," the Englishman answered imperturbably, "It’s simply that my room is on fire."

一个英国人
   一天晚上,一个英国人从他住的旅店房间里走出来。来到走廊上,叫旅店的服务员给他拿一杯水来。服务员按他的要求做了。英国人回到了他的房间里,几分钟后他又来到走廊上,让服务员再给他送一杯水。服务员又给他送了一杯水。每隔几分钟。英国人就走出房间重复他的要求。 半小时之后.这位感到惊讶的服务员决定问问房客要这些水干什么,英国人不谎不忙地回答:”没什么.只不过是我的房间里起火了。“
160#
 楼主| 发表于 2011-10-27 22:03 | 只看该作者
2011-10-27
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

And the father replied,"I don't know, son, I'm still paying."


婚姻的成本
一个小男孩问他的父亲,“爸爸,要花多少钱才能结婚呢?”
“我也不知道,我现在还在交钱。”父亲回答。
159#
 楼主| 发表于 2011-10-26 22:40 | 只看该作者
2011-10-26:
Julie was saying her bedtime prayers. &quotlease God," she said, "Make Naples the capital of Italy. Make Naples the capital of Italy."

  Her mother interrupted and said, "Julie, why do you want God to make Naples the capital of Italy?"
        And Julie replied,Because that’s what I put in my geography exam!
睡前祷告词   

朱莉叶在做睡前祷告。“祷告上帝,”她说,“让那不勒斯成为意大利的首都吧。让那不勒斯成为意大利的首都吧。”   

妈妈打断她说:“朱莉叶,你为什么求上帝让那不勒斯成为意大利的首都呢?”   


朱莉叶回答说:“因为我在地理考卷上是这么写的。”
158#
发表于 2011-10-9 19:28 | 只看该作者
Foolish...
157#
 楼主| 发表于 2011-10-9 17:50 | 只看该作者
10.09
When I taught the introduction-to-theater course at North Dakota State University, I required my students to attend the university theater's current production and write a critique. After viewing a particularly fine performance, one student wrote: "The play was so real, I thought I was actually sitting on my couch at home, watching it on television."
我在北达科他州立大学教戏剧入门课时,要求学生们去看学校剧团当时的演出,并写一篇评论。看了一场极为精彩的演出后,一名学生写道:“这部戏剧是如此逼真,以致于我认为我自己是坐在家里的沙发上,从电视上看到的。”
156#
 楼主| 发表于 2011-10-9 17:44 | 只看该作者
想继续下去了。。。。
155#
 楼主| 发表于 2009-1-18 21:05 | 只看该作者
2009.01.18

The World's Greatest Swordsman

At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.

His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.

"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled. "You missed!"

"Ah," replied the swordsman, "you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father."


中文:

世界上最伟大的击剑手

在一场世界最佳击剑手表演中,排名第三的击剑手上场了。一只苍蝇放了出来,剑划了一个弧,他将苍蝇劈成了两半。观众欢呼起来。紧接着排名第二的人将一只苍蝇切成了四半。现场一阵沉默,人们期盼着世界上最伟大的击剑手出场。
他的剑锋以一个巨大的弧线划了下来--然而那只昆虫还在继续飞行!观众被惊呆了。最伟大的击剑手完全错过了他的目标,然而他还在微笑着。
“你为什么这么高兴?”有人嚷道,“你没击中!”
“啊,”剑手答道,“你刚才没有很仔细地看。苍蝇还活着,是的--但他永远也做不成爸爸了。
154#
 楼主| 发表于 2009-1-18 21:04 | 只看该作者
2009.01.17

First Flight

Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.

His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.

After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?"

"Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."


中文:

第一次坐飞机

约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机,他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以,有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时,约翰逊先生非常担心,不敢接受。不过,由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的,约翰逊先生终于被说服了,登上了飞机。
他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落,所以他吓得紧闭双眼。
过了一两分钟,他睁开双眼朝窗外望去,接着对朋友说道:“看下面那些人,他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小,是不是?”
“那些就是蚂蚁,”他的朋友答道,“我们还在地面上。”
153#
 楼主| 发表于 2009-1-16 22:26 | 只看该作者
2009.01.16

First Flight

Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.

His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.

After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?"

"Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."


中文:

第一次坐飞机

约翰逊先生从前未乘过飞机,他读过许多关于飞行事故的报道。所以,有一天一位朋友邀请他乘自己的小飞机飞行时,约翰逊先生非常担心,不敢接受。不过,由于朋友不断保证说飞行是很安全的,约翰逊先生终于被说服了,登上了飞机。
他的朋友启动引擎开始在机场跑道上滑行。约翰逊先生听说飞行中最危险的是起飞与降落,所以他吓得紧闭双眼。
过了一两分钟,他睁开双眼朝窗外望去,接着对朋友说道:“看下面那些人,他们看起来就象蚂蚁一样小,是不是?”
“那些就是蚂蚁,”他的朋友答道,“我们还在地面上。”
152#
发表于 2009-1-16 00:54 | 只看该作者
这篇短文以前高中英语学过。
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